Your First Nigerian Wedding? Here’s Everything You Need to Know

From asoebi and dress codes to music, money spraying, and cultural etiquette - this guide has you covered!

Photo: @chimelpixel

Nigerian weddings are not subtle affairs. They are grand, expressive, deeply cultural, and intentionally elaborate.

The food served, the coordinated fabrics known as asoebi, the seating arrangements, and the traditions involving extended family, every detail is carefully considered and carries meaning and history. Whether the celebration takes place in Lagos, London, or Los Angeles, Nigerians bring the same BIG energy to their weddings; so much so that guests from other cultures now look forward to experiencing a Nigerian wedding at least once.

If you grew up outside Nigeria or just aren’t  familiar with Nigerian culture, attending a Nigerian wedding for the first time can be…well, a bit overwhelming; especially when guest lists and a clearly defined schedule are more like suggestions than the rule.

Whether you’re attending your very first Nigerian wedding, accompanying friends or family, or reconnecting with your cultural roots as a guest, one thing quickly becomes clear: a Nigerian wedding is about far more than the ceremony;  it is the coming together of two families, two lineages, and sometimes entire communities. 

This guide breaks down what to expect as a guest, through the lens of someone in the diaspora experiencing a Nigerian wedding for the first time.

Family aren’t just  guests  — they are the Core

If you’re used to Western weddings, where the focus is mostly on the couple, attending a Nigerian wedding can feel different. Here, family members aren't just present - they shape the celebration and influence every major decision including whether or not the marriage can hold.

Parents are involved from the beginning of the wedding planning stages. Aunties, uncles, elders, and even family friends have opinions on your wedding. So, when you see family members sharing the spotlight on the wedding day, it’s not them trying to take over the wedding, it’s simply how things are done.

You can’t outshine the bride!

Photo: @officiallbigdealweddings

At a Nigerian wedding, no one worries about outshining the bride.

Fashion is part of the celebration itself, not something kept minimal or understated.

Unlike Western weddings where guests often blend into the background, Nigerian weddings are visually expressive. The moment you walk into the venue, the colours stand out.

Rich, vibrant and colourful fabrics with coordinated looks fill the space, creating an atmosphere that feels both cultural and intentional. This is known as asoebi; a tradition where guests attending a particular wedding buy fabric as chosen by the couple and sew it into an outfit to wear on the day of the wedding. It is common to see several asoebi groups at one wedding. The bride’s family may have their own fabric, while the groom’s family would have another, each distinct in colour and pattern. Friends of both families, the bridal party, and close circles may also appear in separate coordinated fabrics, each representing a different relationship to the couple.

Although wearing asoebi is not mandatory, it serves as a way for family and friends to show support for the couple. Asoebi is not about matching for appearance alone, rather, it signals belonging and is the visual representation of culture.

For this reason, repeating asoebi outfits at Nigerian weddings is generally avoided, even if unspoken.

There Will Be Food - A Lot of It!

Food is taken seriously! If a guest leaves hungry, it is considered a failure of hosting.

Meals are served generously and in variety. Guests can expect a mix of traditional Nigerian dishes and intercontinental options. Starters often include ‘small chops’, followed by familiar favourites such as jollof rice and assorted soups served with pounded yam or eba.

For first-time guests, especially those accustomed to plated meals and fixed menus, the scale can be surprising. However, within Nigerian culture, this abundance is intentional as feeding guests well is a sign of respect, pride, and gratitude.

Food reflects the couple’s appreciation for everyone who came to celebrate with them

Understanding this helps explain why Nigerian weddings are planned with generosity in mind not only in food, but in every detail that contributes to the guest experience.

MONEY IS A PART OF THE CELEBRATION

Rather than placing money in envelopes and gifting it to the couple discretely, guests usually opt for showing their appreciation publicly by literally showering or spraying money on the couple or parents of the couple during key moments involving dancing.

Spraying is not random, and guests are never forced to participate. In many cases, the wedding MC clearly announces when it is time, guiding the flow of the event.

A skilled DJ, good pacing, and a lively atmosphere all contribute to how guests respond. In this sense, the energy of the wedding is often reflected in how much money is sprayed.

Photo: @officiallbigdealweddings

Time Is… Flexible

Attending a Nigerian wedding before the time stated on the invitation is generally unnecessary as you will likely just end up waiting around, as the wedding usually kicks off well after the scheduled time. 

At Nigerian weddings, elders, key family members, and traditional steps often determine when the wedding festivities really begin, not the clock.

So the day builds gradually. Music starts gently and softly, guests come in, the families of both couple arrive, and once everything and everyone is seated, the wedding officially begins. It can be frustrating at first, especially if you’re used to strict schedules, but patience is part of the experience.

Final Thoughts

A Nigerian wedding isn’t something you fully understand by watching from the outside. You really just have to be there!

It doesn’t always run smoothly or follow a strict plan,  but it’s intentional. It’s full of personality, culture, laughter, and real emotion.

And whether you are attending a Nigerian wedding or planning one, you don’t just leave with pictures and videos; you leave with a clearer understanding of community, culture, and what it truly means to belong.

Planning A Nigerian Wedding?

If you’re planning a Nigerian wedding and asoebi is on your list, Simply Asoebi is here to help.

Book your initial call with us and let’s bring your asoebi vision to life. We’ll talk colours, guest groups, and show you exactly how our services handling everything from fabric sourcing and tailoring to delivery to guests, make the process smoother for you and your guests.

Initial Consultation (Virtual)

£35.00

30min

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